Ask not what Britain can do for you…. |
 38.7 percent of us (the Apathetic Majority) didn’t bother to vote at the last election. That represents 14.4 million of the voting population. Which makes us the biggest, most ineffectual and most irresponsible group in the land. It was the Apathetic Majority who, by default, allowed sensitive well-intentioned activists to gain the moral high ground where, encouraged by public-spirited members of the legal profession, they persuaded the more gullible amongst us that Britain would be a far better place in which to live if only we abolished physical punishment and embraced political correctness, human rights excesses and a cult of compensation. So we did. Big mistake. Britain hasn’t become a far better place in which to live. In fact our punishment free society has become a breeding ground for spongers, louts, villains and juvenile snots who grow evermore obnoxious with each additional right, freedom and privilege bestowed upon them. Understandably, they now possess nil respect for authority and experience nothing but utter contempt or mild amusement at the sissy wrist-slapping efforts being made to get tough with them. Worse, the sensitive well-intentioned people who stand tall with their hand on the national rudder have somehow convinced themselves that it’s OK not to do anything to make Britain a better place in which to live which might possibly compromise the diktats of their own conscience or politically correct leanings. No problem. The Grumpies, a bold and innovative new breed of exceptionally good-looking real men will, immediately after having seized power, dispense with all that silliness and swiftly resolve the nation's many and varied problems, right all wrongs and transform Britain into a winner. To celebrate the occasion we’ll be introducing our ever-so-caring but totally merciless new Attila-the-Hun style regime of fear, pain, terror, deprivation and death. Which means the writing is on the wall for all work-shy spongers, louts, villains, juvenile snots, public spirited lawyers, the Lying Mad-Dog Media, and all politicians, bureaucrats and City fat-cats more attracted to the notion of milking the nation than contributing to the nation. But first I have to awaken that Sleeping Giant, the Apathetic Majority. I’m going to ask them to add their names to the Grumpy's monthly petition on the Prime Minister's website. Then, if what I'm saying or the way I'm saying it amuses, upsets, shames or hits the right note with enough of them, I'm going to seize control of the nation. Don't get me wrong. I don't particularly relish the prospect of having to spend my time running the country. I'd far rather somebody else assume responsibility for eliminating injustice and transforming Britain into a winner. But who else has the vision or the balls to do it? Peter (Grumpy) Stokes – Founder member and leader of the Party Find out more at http://www.thegrumpyoldmenpoliticalparty.org.uk  and add your name to the PM’s petition!Track record - Son of a Welsh coal hewer. Secondary Modern education. Print apprentice. Volunteered to serve in Her Majesty’s Regular Army where he was constantly involved in close-quarter combat, mostly in hostile NAAFIs throughout the Middle East. Subsequently held production, administrative, sales and marketing positions in several companies before launching a new venture capital and business consultancy. Co-founded, personally financed and was an Executive Director, lead trouble-shooter and fifty percent shareholder in over seventy companies throughout Britain, France, North America and the Caribbean embracing property, antiques, insurance, security, data-capture, recruitment, publishing, the Internet and a raft of companies in the creative services sector. Ken Stokes Business Forms was the second most successful of them. Founded in 1973 as a two-man company off the back of a £20k personal loan it was sold to Rockware Plc in 1987 for £22.5 million. Author of The One-Man Venture Capitalist and the Alternative Career. Known internationally as the ‘Brains’ behind the London Manhattan Smelly Tramp Debt Collection Service. |